Monday, September 21, 2009

Ex girlfriend drink (part 1)


Months ago, after being unceremoniously kicked out of the place I shared with my girlfriend, her 2 kids AND her mother, I was on the hunt for a new crib. Single again, I would begin anew and  would buy all the things I'd left behind. Anything is replaceable... With the exception of about 6 or 7 THOUSAND pieces of LEGO that had been in my family since, like, the seventies. I realize my older brother has a one year old that would love these in a few years. I cannot face the slings and arrows of my family members when they find out that the LEGOS are gone, especially to a young lady they were none too fond of. Not a chance.  I call her, no answer. Leave message. No response. I finally show up to her work. "Sorry, I've been busy...", she mutters. I tell her I need them back ASAP, and I need her to separate MY LEGOS from her sons LEGO. Since I'd lived with them, about 2 years, he has collected maybe 3 sets of LEGOS. Batman and stuff. Not old school LEGO. We know the difference. Well, she won't have time! I tell her to take care of it and then, in a moment of weakness, I say, "Take 2 months. Sept. 20th I'll be by to pick up the LEGOS and any other stuff I left behind." Now, 2 months is a long time. Lots of LEGOS though. Shouldn't be a big problem. Sept. 20th rolls around. She has 2 kids, whom I love dearly, a mom and a new boyfriend. You can either choose to have these people there, or not have them there on the 20th. Easier for everyone if its just you and me, right? Nope. Its better for her to have everyone there. No worries. Ol' Tone handles it like a champ and shakes the new guys hand. Accepts hugs and kisses from said kids. A hello and a smile from the mom. Dog licks face. Clearly I was an unconscionable BASTARD when I lived here. ANYWAY, the ex and I joke around while the kids try (and succeed!) to impress me with new moves they've learned since I've been gone. Cartwheels, jumping on one foot, somersaults, you know. Well. Adios. I tell the kids that I miss them, and they respond the same way. I'm off. I am home and I go through the stuff and the LEGOS I get back are pictured. Seriously. about 800 pieces. I know they are toys, people. I know people have lost Zillions of dollars in divorces and all that. Its just that these belong to MY family, not hers. I call her up and she proceeds to tell me that she forgot to do it until last night, at which point she got her son to do it. She then acts as if the whole thing is a joke and for me to relax. I tell her that I will come and take ALL the LEGOS,  regardless of who they belong to, if she is gonna screw around. She says she'll have em ready by Tuesday. We shall see. My question is this, people. Who do I hafta not  screw around on but  just get so incredibly bored and disgusted with fucking so she THINKS I'm cheating and will wonder  why I never come to bed at night and when we DO have sex, I fake a few orgasms (no, it wasn't just the one she caught me faking) with to gedda drink around here?

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